The Barnyard Commandos were a kick-ass line of toy action figures made by Playmates in the late 1980’s and early 90’s. Much like Mattel’s Food Fighters toys, they came in two rival factions – There were the R.A.M.S. (Rebel Army of Military Sheep) and then there were the P.O.R.K.S. (Platoon Of Rebel Killing Swine). Needless to say that the two groups did not get along. The story behind these toys is that these animals accidentally ate radioactive waste abandoned by the military on their farm, thus mutating into intelligent and vicious military killing machines.

If you were a kid back then you probably have fond childhood memories about playing with these toys. They really didn’t do much as they were made of soft hollow plastic and weren’t poseable, but they were the meanest looking things on the store shelves back then. They were always scowling and had tattoos and eyepatches – Exactly the kind of image that kids growing up think is awesome. There’s just something really badass about a sheep with a rocket launcher strapped to its back. The Barnyard Commandos were so cool that they didn’t need to have moving parts – They encouraged the use of your imagination, and that was perfect. Kids would get their friends together and play war between the Rams and Pigs and have a great time without the need for technologically advanced electronics. The world of children’s toys back then was exciting and full of life. Not like these days…

There was also a Saturday Morning Cartoon produced based on the toys, but it was really lame and was canceled after four episodes. Burger King also tried getting in on the short Barnyard Commandos craze by putting out a line of tie-in toys included with their Kid’s Meals.

The Barnyard Commandos are pretty hard to find nowadays due to their limited production run, so if you can find some for sale you should definitely try to buy them. The second series of the toys included vehicles for the Barnyard Commandos to ride in, which are especially rare these days.

Here is a list of all of the Barnyard Commandos figures that were produced:

Series 1

R.A.M.S.

* Sergeant Woolly Pullover
* Commodore Fleece Cardigan
* Major Legger Mutton
* Pilot Fluff Pendleton

P.O.R.K.S.

* General Hamfat Lardo
* Private Side O’Bacon
* Sergeant Shoat N. Sweet
* Captain Tusker Chitlins

Series 2

R.A.M.S.

* Master Sargent Cornelius Cannonfodder
* Private Bull Bellwether
* Commander Missiles Muttonchop
* Lieutenant Sureshot Shearling

P.O.R.K.S.

* Corporal Hy Ondahog
* Staff Sergeant Blaster McBacon
* Major Piggyback Gunner
* Captain Hogg Wilde

Vehicles

* Bacon Bomber
* Pork Chopper
* Pork-A-Pult
* Ram Tank

So, that’s what the Barnyard Commandos are all about – If you still have some lying around, cherish them, as they’re one of the many really cool toy lines to have slipped through the cracks and cruely forgotten by the sands of time.